i was doing QT ytd and came across this in "My Daily Bread": Forever Joyful
after thinking about it for a while,
i realised that it really make sense..

unknowingly, I've changed bit by bit.
it's only that i did not dare to admit it..
many times, i feel that i cannot blend into my surroundings,
simply to join in the fun.
with friends, i no longer feel that closeness i used to have.
probably because i chose to back out..
but i still know that they care..

during this period, many people became closer to me in turn
at first i thought that it was due to me taking a step back, n saw more things..
but now, i realised..
it's a blessing to have these precious people around me(:

that day at church, many surrounded the piano and started to chat..
i was sitting at the side, but just didn't know how to "blend into" their conversations..
so i took out my phone, hoping there'll be an unread msg.
sad to say, but there weren't.
den i msged my sis, telling her i was being "anti- social" again.. ):
and we sent a few msges back and forth..

after a while, someone came to sit beside me.
though he didn't say anything at first, but i really appreciated it.. (:
then the same scenario happened..
and he came to chat with me again.. (:
thanks alot!! Really! (u know who u are..)

now as i'm typing this post,
i hear my sis on the phone chatting to her fren..
she just said "we're so alike" to her best fren, talking about hw..
how i wish i could say that too to someone close..
but this hols, i haven been chatting to my frens lately..
initially, i thought they disliked my presence..
however, i feel that it's actually my prob.
i wanna solve it la..
but can someone help me?..

feeling a bit luan now..
but i guess it'll be better when school reopens.. (:
i shall be 乐观yah?
everything would be better..
明天会更好(: